Took the advice from the stream and reworked

Theres some balancing issues I think I still have to address as far as the elements I added after the feedback I got today. Tried to work your advice into the production of this track and this is what I came out with. 

In trying to keep with that "tripped out 4 am vibe I decided to keep that section at about 1 min in (mostly because its my favorite bit). I know its breakbeat but I added some more consistent hi hat elemts and tried to cut the length of the breakbeat sections to give it a more dance floor feel. I also tried to bring up the synth at 30 sec and add some more layers so that drop out isn't as abrupt but I don't know if that problem is still there.   

uploaded the draft to my page on the community but won't ever be mad at someone giving me a soundcloud listen. 

Appreciate all the guidance as I'm learning!

https://soundcloud.com/user-692447050/bleep/s-2kZIQGQ681d?si=1f5f313a3add4dd49389af1a7f00fe74&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

Edit: the track rendered an extra 40 seconds. Will be corrected.

updated by @mindrip: 07/13/23 06:37:02AM

Yes! Great job! I much prefer this rework! And well done for turning it around so quickly. This has actually made my day - I was worried the feedback was too critical and maybe you wouldn't take it onboard. I think it was just my mindset after the technically disastrous stream though! 

I still find the volume drop at the beginning of the breakdown a touch odd, and would maybe have the synth that comes in louder rather than fading in, but it's definitely much better than before. 

You've certainly kept the tripping out 4am vibe but I think it's got a nicer balance of randomness and consistency now. 

I would probably add even more layers to the drums (tops etc.) to fill them out some more, but it's definitely better with what you've done. I'm looking forward to hearing how your music develops

updated by @robjones: 07/13/23 02:18:13PM

I was on the stream last night - this track has improved a lot! As Rob says, it's sounding much more balanced and has a good progression/structure. Good mixdown as well. I guess take everything you've learnt and apply it to your forthcoming tracks!. Looking forward to hearing what you do next